Girl Lets Internet Boyfriend Tattoo Her Face with His Name Within 24 Hours of Meeting

Um, I have no idea. I wish there was something I could say that’s profoundly impervious to the gravity of this situation, but there are no words to express the sheer terror and awesomeness of this fail.

Ruslan Toumaniantz, a tattoo artist, recently met a girl, and after 24 hours of knowing her, he didn’t ask to get into her pants,just to tattoo his name across her face. And she said, why the hell not. And so, Toumaniantz’s girlfriend, Lesya, who he me met in a chat room, is now the proud owner of 5-inch Gothic script across her grill.

Fascination abounds.

To Toumaniantz, who is also completely covered in tats as well, I say bravo. Sometimes you just have to reach out for that butterfly and grab it. A closed mouth doesn’t get fed, and now you can start your sister-wife program off with a bang.

To Lesya, you’re a loon. Oh yeah, she also has “All for Love” tattooed above her eyebrow.”It’s a symbol of our eternal devotion. I’d like him to tattoo every inch of my body,” she said. I think Ruslan found a secret stash of Quagmire’s roofie colota mix, giggity. That’s really the only logical explanation. Yeah, Family Guy did it.

Toumaniantz is not stranger to conflict. Three years ago he covered a girl’s face with a galaxy of stars. 56 to be exact. Kimberley Vlaeminck, claimed that she only asked for three, and Toumaniantz continued on as she nodded off in the chair.

She later told the media that she was fibbing, in an elaborate scheme to trick her father. Yeah, if you can sleep through 53 face tattoos, you might just be one of the X-men.

Toumaniantz and Lesya are planning to get married, and she is studying to become a tattoo artist under his guiding hand, of course. Lesya has received rave reviews from equally dimwitted friends on her Facebook page.