Is Facebook Killing Your Man Card?

Facebook stalker knuckle dragger magazineI’m a Facebook stalker , can’t deny it in any shape or form. I watch the threads, updates, new pictures, relationship updates, and all of the “LOL” goodness that has been thrust into our mainstream society.

One frightening trend I’ve noticed is guys completely loosing every rational sense of being manly. It’s a terrifying sight to read a comment from a guy that says “There’s no one more beautiful than you. Your eyes are like the ocean in the night.” Followed by a heart and a smiley face. And all for a woman who this guy doesn’t really know, he just saw her duckface picture and a post that said, “I’m waiting for my prince charming…Frownie face.”

Something that guys need to understand first and foremost, the possibility of hooking up with a girl from Facebook is as about as likely as you stumbling across a bag of money followed by being hit on by a Victoria’s Secret model that proceeds to make you a sandwich as you tell he about the latest level change on Call of Duty.

Women meet real guys at real places, like the gym, bar, grocery store, or any other relatively normal place attractive females act like they don’t see you looking at them. Making yourself look like a writer from Lifetime doesn’t make you seem any more dreamy. In fact, it makes you look like you should be driving a Volkswagen Beetle (With the Daisy in the Dash).

It’s ok to be a man on Facebook. It’s ok to say that you like boobs and ass. Women already know that’s what we’re looking at anyway. Why do you think they post pictures of them in booty shorts, to show their moms how well they can dance like a stripper? I think not. They want the likes, and the attention, but one thing they don’t want or need is a date, boyfriend with a heart of gold, or to see pictures of you holding a litter of kittens you just rescued from a cat milking ring.

Keep it in perspective, Keep it loose, and for the love of skittles, keep it manly. Over and out.

Featured Articles

“Gym Wildlife” Video Makes Every Gym Goer Look Like an Asshole…And It’s 100% Correct.

Something happened the other day. YouTube production team, “Buff Dudes”, made a parody video of what about gym culture, and it complete wrecks every person that has been to the gym. Obviously discounting old people who talk most of the time and fall asleep mid rep. They’ve also left out the all important mom demographic, […]

10 Hours Driving Around NYC with an Exotic Car [Graphic Content]

Some people disgust me. I mean a guy can’t even take his 300k supercar around without being harassed and asked to take pictures. The paint was repeatedly touched, and people yelled out comments as he was sitting at stop lights and parking lots. If you don’t like exotic car harassment, this isn’t the video for […]

Girl in Bikini gets Humped by Dolphin. She liked it.

The internet provides us with a multitude of entertaining viewing options. 24-7. From porn to squirrels juggling knives, the world is your oyster, you web-surfing champion. http://www.whateverthefugyouwannasee.org Well, today we have a dolphin humping a busty blonde. Barbie, who clearly lives up to her name, is on vacation and at one of those fancy dolphin […]

Hot Nurse Gives Free Testicle Exams on The Street [Video]

So, this happened on the internet. In an effort to promote awareness for testicular cancer, a hot young malady in a more hot nurses outfit offered to give men free testicle examinations. At first, guys were a little hesitant, but then they realized, there’s an attractive woman willing to look for change in their coin […]

Cooking with Coolio

Coolio, rapper extraordinaire is about to take you on a fantasy voyage through the gangsta’s paradise of culinary excellence with his new cookbook. Not only can Coolio tear up the sound waves, he can bring some ghetto-fabulous flavor to your dull suburban kitchen. This ain’t no Emeril Lagasse or Rachel Ray, Coolio is about to […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: