Survive “Frankenstorm” with some Tactical Bacon!

Never run out of bacon again $19.95 msrp

There’s a lot of things in life you can’t live without. Family, money, love, and there’s one other thing missing there, BACON! Can you imagine a world without bacon? Neither can I.

So, when I came across Tactical Bacon, it seemed like my prayers had been answered. From “Frankenstorms”,  Zombie Apocalypses, to complete nuclear fallout, rest assured the last few minutes of your life you’ll be guaranteed to have at least one of those fours things listed above by your side, bacon.

With a shelf life of over 10 years, Tactical Bacon will be there for you through thick and thin. The bacon is actual stripped pieces of the filthy swine we came to love so much. There’s approximately 54 pieces of cooked bacon in each 9 oz. can, and be used while camping, hunting, fishing, and/or the end of the world.

Where can you buy Tactical Bacon locally? I was able to get my stockpile Tactical Bacon at Anthony’s Arms in West Mifflin, across from the Allegheny County Airport. Not sure how much is left after I cleaned them out preparing for “Frankenstorm” moving up the East Coast, but you’re more than welcome to stop by and check.

Dear Primantis, please buy several cases of Tactical Bacon, so you can stop running out of bacon every night. It would make a lot of drunk people and my vertically challenged friend Brian, so much more happier…

The Ultimate Tactical Bacon Commercial:

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