Top Three Hottest Vampires

Time to get your blood boiling with our top five pics of today’s hottest vampires. Yes, they want to suck your blood [Insert Innuendo Here]

Rhona Mitra

1. Rhona Mitra, the Uber hottie who played Sonja in Underworld: Rise of the Lycans proved a formidable stand in for one, Kate Beckinsale. Another Uber hottie that we’ll be talking about shortly.

Mitra played a solid role and even threw down a few times with some convincing sword fighting.

Mitra started out her career as a live Laura Croft Model, and has appeared in a litany of other films, including Hollow Man. A terrible movie yes, but she is nude. So, you’ll have to bear Kevin Bacon as an invisible creeper for a few minutes.

2. Salma Hayek, the little Mexican(Literally, she’s only 5’2) spark plug stole our hearts, and blood in From Dusk till Dawnand made all men across America start wondering how

Salma Hayek

bad would it really be to be an ageless, lifeless, souless being. It might be worth it, she did have an awful big snake in her hand.

Hayek has been in a myriad of movies, with her breakout film being Frida, in which she won an Academy award. She was also in Wild Wild West with Will Smith, in which they should have taken that award right back for her participation in such an epically shitty movie.

Hayek is a pillar in the community, is into all kinds of activism and even breastfed some random baby halfway across the world be cause the kid’s mother couldn’t produce milk.

And to top it off, she’s married to Francois-Henri Pinault, a billionaire businessman and all around winner…not because of the money, mainly because he gets to eat Mexican every night.

Kate Beckinsale

3. Kate Beckinsale, Perhaps the hottest vampire out of our trifecta of hotties, Beckinsale torched the screen in the Underworld franchise of movies as  Selene. The British born actress, has modeled since 1997 and was named the sexiest woman alive by Esquire magazine in 2009.

A point that we here at Knuckle Dragger Magazine cannot argue. Her only non hottie attribute, she’s been smoking since she was 16. Hopefully she doesn’t have the Amy Winehouse teeth going on. Those Brits can do some damage in the dental area.

Beckinsale married the producer of underworld, Len Wiseman, back in 2004 and has appeared in other films like Contraband, Serendipity, and Total Recall.

Although her latest Underworld sequel,  “Awakening”, was the weakest out of the 4 films, she still remains quite distracting in a skin tight leather suit.

Featured Articles

“Gym Wildlife” Video Makes Every Gym Goer Look Like an Asshole…And It’s 100% Correct.

Something happened the other day. YouTube production team, “Buff Dudes”, made a parody video of what about gym culture, and it complete wrecks every person that has been to the gym. Obviously discounting old people who talk most of the time and fall asleep mid rep. They’ve also left out the all important mom demographic, […]

10 Hours Driving Around NYC with an Exotic Car [Graphic Content]

Some people disgust me. I mean a guy can’t even take his 300k supercar around without being harassed and asked to take pictures. The paint was repeatedly touched, and people yelled out comments as he was sitting at stop lights and parking lots. If you don’t like exotic car harassment, this isn’t the video for […]

Girl in Bikini gets Humped by Dolphin. She liked it.

The internet provides us with a multitude of entertaining viewing options. 24-7. From porn to squirrels juggling knives, the world is your oyster, you web-surfing champion. http://www.whateverthefugyouwannasee.org Well, today we have a dolphin humping a busty blonde. Barbie, who clearly lives up to her name, is on vacation and at one of those fancy dolphin […]

Hot Nurse Gives Free Testicle Exams on The Street [Video]

So, this happened on the internet. In an effort to promote awareness for testicular cancer, a hot young malady in a more hot nurses outfit offered to give men free testicle examinations. At first, guys were a little hesitant, but then they realized, there’s an attractive woman willing to look for change in their coin […]

Cooking with Coolio

Coolio, rapper extraordinaire is about to take you on a fantasy voyage through the gangsta’s paradise of culinary excellence with his new cookbook. Not only can Coolio tear up the sound waves, he can bring some ghetto-fabulous flavor to your dull suburban kitchen. This ain’t no Emeril Lagasse or Rachel Ray, Coolio is about to […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: